Issue of April 16, 2017
Mt. Province

Panagbenga Flower Festival
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"Diyos ko naman, sino ba ang walang racket?"

For coming up with the wrong answers while being queried by President DU30 during a Cabinet meeting, DILG Secretary Ismael Sueno was fired on the spot, to the delight of three of Sueno’s undersecretaries who had long been pressuring Malacañang to investigate Sueno’s alleged corrupt activities.

Poor Sueno, a close Duterte lieutenant in earlier days, instead of claiming that he had done nothing wrong, and that DU30 was likely misinformed, should have followed Speaker Pantaleon Alvarez’ example or line, and should just have said, by way of reply to his boss’ questions, “Diyos ko naman amo, sino ba ang walang racket?”

* * * * * * * * * * *

Alas, goodness and honesty are now things of the past, but in other countries – Japan for example, the loss of honor is enough reason to resign from public service, even taking one’s own life.

But even convicted criminals long languishing in death row or meted out life sentences sing the song “Habang may buhay.”

But no longer the 7,000 plus drug offenders. Still, the death toll will not scare drug addicts to mend their ways.

But a beheaded Mexican cartel or bamboo gang boss definitely will.

Lining up policemen involved in the drug trade and done away with like Lim Sing will also do the trick.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Allelujah, the Lord is risen, and the Christian world rejoices. All week long the devil was in hibernation, knowing Holy Week wasn’t the best time to tempt God’s disciples and people.

But tomorrow, it will be back to business as usual. All the promises made on Maundy Thursday and Good Friday will quickly be forgotten.

Ah, but promises are made only to be broken – promises made by politicians and other government officials, promises made by erring husbands to their wives, promises made by near adult children to their parents, promises made by (other) philanderers, gamblers, and drunks to never again, only to do it over and over until the next Holy Week.

* * * * * * * * * * *

At last the “Big Event” that the world has long feared – or hoped – to happen, may finally happen.

Pretentious tough guy Donald Trump, because he is the president of the most powerful nation on Earth, thinks he can do what his predecessors didn’t dare do, like telling North Korea to back off or else.

Trump forgets that the North Koreans not only hate the United States, their young leader, who is a clown unto himself, but a dangerous clown nonetheless, considers Trump a bumbling fool trying to make real life into a Hollywood movie, produced and directed by Trump, with him in the starring role.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Okay Donald, the so-called bad guys retort, you want a war, we will give it to you, see who runs out of missiles first.

Like they say, when elephants fight, the ants get trampled or crushed.

But with two crazy elephants, no one will be left standing after the smoke of battle clears.

* * * * * * * * * * *

But what about the Russkies? I bet you right now Trump’s people are frantically trying to get in touch with Russian president Vladimir Putin, if only to assure him that Trump’s fighting stance is just for show, for the benefit of the Chinese and a naïve free world.

Putin is not only a Trump friend and ally, he was a co-conspirator in bringing down Hillary Clinton in the last U.S. elections, and one wonders how many Benedict Arnolds are there in Trump’s camp.

Blame the moon for what is happening to the world. It is the lunatics who are now in charge.

* * * * * * * * * * *

By now President DU30 realizes that running a country is not the same as running a city.

Lee Kuan Yew was a successful leader because he administered a city pretending to be a country. Ten to 1, Duterte patterned his Davao after Singapore – no littering, no making trouble, and especially no drugs.

But if Singapore had a population of 100 million plus people, Lee Kuan Yew would have ended up like Marcos. Not as a thief, but a dictator who couldn’t get things done.

* * * * * * * * * * *

I think DU30 should lay off a bit in his war on drugs and now train his guns on the big shots.

Are the 10 billionaires in the country paying the right taxes? Could they be the reason why the economy is in shambles?

And maybe DU30 should not get too friendly with the Chinese. The Chinese were born to be businessmen, and friendship is good only if it is good for business, with due apologies to my Chinoy friends.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Tone down the cuss words, too, Mr. President, and picking a fight with media and the Church will not do you any good. Let them do their worst, and if you do your job right, media and the Church will lose their luster, and please, addressing the problem of poverty is not giving in to the poor, who will likewise abuse you just like the rich do.

Every day, if schedule permits, drop inside a church and talk to the Lord – 10, 20 minutes or so, and however you decide things, listen only to what your conscience tells you.

As for your friends, distance yourself away from them, so they will be on their toes all the time.

Happy Easter!

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