July 19, 2024

Dear Manang,
Different strokes for different folks are easily said but such a pain. I have two relatives in particular who seem to get a high out of feeling sorry for themselves. Of recent, they remembered how they were “abandoned” by their mothers and how it made their lives miserable. However, we are only as good as what we know but not of what the circumstances were. Their versions are skewed and seem to have forgotten what really went on. Is there a remedy?
Fel of Camp 4, Kennon Road

Dear Fel,
Oh my! I have a handful of friends who are such. How about listening to the same violins since childhood days? As you say, some personalities love to be melancholy and that’s it. That is their makeup. I guess you fear the others who might believe the soul strings but I think you misjudge the situation and the impression that others have. Let them be.
Find your peace,

Dear Manang,
I am a believer of “life is what we make it”. I cannot see how come people can thrive in dire situations when there are many opportunities that even this pandemic has opened. My niece has enjoyed begging for financial help for many years. This time she says she is sick and has a fever. Is it a bad thing if I am not about to budge because she is trying another avenue to beg?
Laila of Sumulong Street, Baguio City

Dear Laila,
You are jaded and calloused. Many of us have the same reaction towards such situations. Have you tried giving them some kind of work or business? Maybe encouraging them to earn on their own will be good. In this way, they will need to show some attempt at helping themselves. How about giving them a donation that they need to convert to cash and earn a little from at the same time?
Give but with a purpose,