Dear Manang,
There is wisdom in silence because the sharp and painful words that can be said are absent. Like daggers, things said in anger and frustration can forever hurt or kill love and respect. I do not want to cause the same hurt that I receive listening to lies and demeaning accusations. But as I keep the thoughts to myself, the knives are sharpened more by the person who is like a hurricane that is gathering more strength instead of allowing the winds to wane. It is not time to make peace.
Carina of Happy Homes, Baguio City
Dear Carina,
I admire your understanding of the situation and the aggravating circumstances. My five cents worth is just to keep silent. It must be guessing what is wrong that is killing the other person who is honing his or her weapons. I am sure that anyone will die of suspense but it is still less hurtful. Particularly because I sense that some persons do not think that they have done anything wrong.
Hold your tongue,
Manang
Dear Manang,
I know that advanced age makes some organs weaken and lose effectiveness. At 80, my hearing is almost gone, and to manage this I must pay attention and watch the lips to guess what someone is saying. Otherwise, it is as if the world is silent. How do I explain this situation to other people?
George of Ambiong, Baguio City
Dear George,
How happy I am that you are the first octogenarian to admit the natural condition. My simple answer is to forewarn people around you that they need to speak louder or in some cases, make sure you are on the side of the good ear. It is bad enough that you do not know what is going on, but to not admit it is total alienation. I can imagine that even with a hearing aid, the important things said can still escape you. Tell the people before a meeting or before you talk to anyone that they must speak up but not together. Accept your condition immediately.
Be honest,
Manang
