September 26, 2022

Dear Manang,
Diversity is beautiful and this is what the world endeavors. I realized that whenever the world begins a crusade for equality, it tears down the system a lot further. Recently, a friend who I thought was a friend showed his true self. He suddenly bolted and just left us in the cold. I consider this as a betrayal because the trust that we gave him for a project was junked and he left the group without explanations. I understand the individual differences, but I can’t understand how these are not part of an order of things. Is that how the world will be in the future, non-committal?
Jenny of Crystal Cave, Baguio City

Dear Jenny,
It is frightening to think about that possibility that anyone can use their own individual difference to just let go of something and everything. This reminds me of the current trend observed in China, bailan, which means “let it rot”. It is a trend described by Beatrice Tomago as, “In this involuted era triggered by China’s intense ‘996’ work culture, new slang terms are being coined to capture young people’s sense of doom and despondency.” This is our version of wala lang, if you ask me. We just do things for our reasons and not to fit in the order of things. I guess we must just accept this attitude because there’s not much we can do to change another person. The antidote is to be aware of your own attitude and avoid this bailan because this is disastrous for the world.
Don’t be one,

Dear Manang,
I have a friend who is close to a politician that I don’t like. I don’t know why it annoys me so much, but I think it’s because she has two feet in different political quarters. It might also be that my loyalty is to the opposite one that she seems to be betraying the other person. It is hypocrisy. Is there a solution to this?
Greta of Dominican Hill, Baguio City

Dear Greta,
What planet did you come from? The cardinal rule in avoiding arguments and destroying friendships is not to talk about politics and religion. Check your pulse if you put importance on the friendship or the topic. Is she more valuable as a friend or as a follower of the politician? If you can answer that, then you act accordingly. As a friend, you can be blind to the political bent. But if you feel for the politician more, then you let go of her in the circle. It is your own compromise with the issue that will solve it.