May 29, 2024

Dear Manang,
Why do people wait for the worst to happen before they pay attention to their health? I wanted to tell my wife so many times that she should mind what she eats but she had to have a mild stroke to realize it. She needs rehab and a change in lifestyle but can you tell me how I am supposed to help her?
Sonny of Camp 8, Baguio City

Dear Sonny,
Mind over matter, I can imagine how worried you are. Sometimes, we take many things for granted. That’s how we women are. I will not tell you the medical stuff but rather tell you that I can imagine how guilty she must be for putting the family through hell with the episode. Can I just say that you just need to ask her if she needs help with anything? Ask first, don’t just do it because it will offend her more and she will try to prove that she can do anything alone. Remind her that you love her is the best antidote.
Ask first,

Dear Manang,
You cannot imagine the pain of losing someone until you see them in a casket. The tears that flow are really about the things that were never said. Little conversations that you put off for years cannot be recalled. My heart is really broken over these sudden announcements of death when I could have made the time to see her while she had treatments for cancer. I need to advice others to say it before the silence becomes forever.
Alicia of Long-long, La Trinidad, Benguet

Dear Alicia,
Thank you for writing. I am glad that you do not seek consolation but you are giving it for me. Yes, this year has been one episode of grief after another for me, too. Those who died during the quarantine did not even have a proper vigil, the relatives of thee friends could not even be condoled with. You are right when you say that we should talk to those people close or not so close to us about how we appreciate them and thank them before we regret it. We must take the time to message them given the digital ways we have at hand.
Send the message,