May 24, 2024

Dear Manang,
How can I stop crying whenever I think of my husband? It has been a year since he left me suddenly because of a massive heart attack. He left me with a little money that will see our three children through college and also a small business that gives me enough to feed my children and pay for our daily needs. He was a responsible father and I miss him more each day. I miss the talks before we slept to process our failures and joys of the day. I miss him so much.
Yvette of Petersville, Baguio City

Dear Yvette,
You are feeling normal grief. Those feelings fill people who experience the loss of a loved one. You are still fortunate because he left you without financial burdens. The how to earn and fend for children is often the heaviest burden of a widow. It seems like you just need to talk to someone to process your feelings. Why don’t you begin the process with your children? Do that at dinner time or any time of the day when you have the chance. It might be helpful to your children too. Listen to them so they too will discover their joys and pain. This helps families discover their strengths.
Talk to your children,
Manang

Dear Manang,
I keep running away from debts. I don’t know how to repay them with my meager income. My stress everyday is how to avoid the angry people to whom I owe money. I need to earn more but I am not good at business because I tend to loan people money and also not get it back. Is there a way to get out of this hole?
Indira of Lexber Heights, Baguio City

Dear Indira,
No problem is too great that God will not help you through. Debts are rooted in wants and not needs. You call your income meager. That is already the cause. If you have that money and know how to spend within it, you will have no problems. But our problem is that we have P1,000 and want to buy shoes worth P1,500. We borrow P500 instead of waiting to save money to buy it. Next month you want something else and spend for it even before paying off the initial P500. Then you borrow to pay the P500 but incurred a new debt plus another. It won’t end unless you stop wanting things. Buy what you need and save up for things that you want.
Live within your means,
Manang